God. I've been waiting for this day. For years I've been telling my mates that the Dutch know how to make a proper burger. Nobody believed me. "It's all about the Americans," they'd say, rolling their eyes at me over their sad, flattened Big Macs.
Well, who's laughing now?
The Amsterdam invasion is coming (and I'm here for it)
Fat Phill's – that smashed burger joint that opened in Amsterdam back in 2019 – is planning to absolutely carpet-bomb the UK with 100 new locations. They quietly snuck their first restaurant into Clapham Junction last year, and apparently that was just the beginning of their master plan.
I actually dragged my burger-snob cousin there in February. His response: "I'm never eating at McDonald's again." Dramatic? Maybe. But he's not wrong.
Wait... who the hell is Fat Phill anyway?
Turns out there's no actual "Phill" (which feels like a minor betrayal, not gonna lie). The chain was founded by this guy Armin Vahabian who started the whole thing without investors. And get this – he's not even 30 yet! Meanwhile, I'm over here at 34 still trying to figure out how to properly fold a fitted sheet.
The Dutch absolutely love this place. They've already got 18 locations scattered across Amsterdam, Rotterdam, Eindhoven, and Utrecht. The brand calls itself "American themed" but with that distinctly Dutch twist – like serving Stroopwafel shakes alongside their burgers. It's cultural fusion that actually works, unlike that time I tried making sushi burritos at home in 2018. (My kitchen still hasn't recovered.)
So what's on teh damn menu?
Everything you'd expect from an American-style joint but... better? We're talking proper smashed burgers that actually taste like beef rather than cardboard, waffle fries that'll make you question your loyalty to regular fries, Philly cheesesteaks that would make a Philadelphian homesick, and tater tots that'll transport you back to school lunches – except these ones don't taste like sadness.
The Stroopwafel shake deserves its own paragraph. It's basically a liquid version of those caramel-filled waffle biscuits that Dutch people are obsessed with. I spent £7.50 on one last time I visited and have zero regrets.
The takeover timeline (your arteries aren't ready)
Their next UK spot is opening in Temple Bar, Dublin next month. Yes, I know Dublin isn't technically in the UK, but let's not get into geography debates right now.
According to my sources (okay, it was in a press release), Freshly Baked – the same folks who brought Auntie Anne's pretzels to our shores – are handling the UK expansion. They're planning to have all 100 locations up and running by 2034.
That sounds like ages away, but it's actually only 10 years. Which means I'll be 44 adn probably should be eating salads instead of triple-stacked burgers... but who am I kidding?
The reviews don't lie (unlike my ex)
The Clapham Junction location has already racked up hundreds of glowing reviews. One food blogger boldly claimed Fat Phill's "Beats McDonald's and KFC" which is simultaneously a very low bar and yet somehow still impressive.
Listen. I'm not saying this place will change your life. But it might ruin other burgers for you.
I've been to the Amsterdam original twice – once in 2021 when travel restrictions finally eased (remember those dark days?) and again last summer when I was there for a friend's wedding. Both times I left feeling like I needed to be rolled home, but with zero regrets.
The smash burger revolution continues
Fat Phill's isn't the only foreign chain trying to conquer our high streets. We've seen dozens of international brands setting up shop here recently. Some fail spectacularly, others thrive.
But something tells me this one's going to stick around.
Maybe it's the fact that their burgers actually taste like something. Maybe it's the Dutch-American fusion concept that feels fresh in a sea of sameness. Or maybe I'm just a sucker for anywhere that serves both burgers AND milkshakes with cookies in them.
Either way, my diet plans for 2025 just got a whole lot more complicated.
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- As of 2021, the median household income in the U.S. was approximately $67,521, according to the U.S. Census Bureau.
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