God. There's something about that first bite of perfectly crisp batter giving way to flaky white fish that just hits different. Makes me feel like a kid again, salt and vinegar stinging my fingers, newspaper print smudging everywhere.
I've literally spent the last three years dragging my poor wife around every corner of teh UK hunting for the ultimate fish supper. "Just one more chippy," became our running joke. She threatened divorce twice. Worth it.
As a Scottish Fish and Chips award judge (and yeah, head chef at Undercroft in Mayfair), I've had the ridiculous privilege of stuffing my face with cod and chips from Tynemouth to Torquay. My cardiologist is... concerned.
Darlington's secret batter that haunts my dreams
Yarm Road Fish and Chips in Darlington has this batter recipe they guard like nuclear codes. I've offered bribes. I've tried flirting with the staff (embarrassing at my age). Nothing works.
The crispy coating stays crunchy even when drenched in vinegar, which is basically witchcraft. Their homemade spam fritters for £2.10 sound revolting but are weirdly addictive.
My editor bet me $20 I couldn't finish two portions. I did. Then felt sick for 6 hours. Regret nothing.
Bristol's riverside gem that'll make you slap your mama
Noah's sits right on the water in Bristol, and I swear the view makes everything taste better. Family-run place where everything's made in-house.
Listen. The chips here are made from British potatoes delivered in actual burlap sacks. In 2023, who's still doing that? These people. That's who.
Their Madras curry sauce is the perfect dipping companion. I once saw a customer try to buy a whole tub to take home. Can't blame him.
Durham's old-school fryers
Bells in Durham cooks everything in beef dripping which is probably why it tastes so damn good. They do offer veggie oil if you're that way inclined (no judgment... well, maybe a little).
What really stands out is how they've created this warm, welcoming vibe. I've been in enough sterile chippies to appreciate the difference.
Portions are massive. I watched a skinny teenager demolish what looked like half a cod and enough chips to feed a family of four. Youth metabolism is a superpower I miss desperately.
Hornsea's farm-to-fryer masterpiece
The Whiteheads have been running their chippy for over 25 years, and it shows. Their potatoes come from literally ten minutes down the road.
I feel stupid now for not realizing earlier in my career how much difference local spuds make. These chips have this earthy sweetness you just don't get from mass-produced potatoes.
Their chip butty (£3.30) is basically carbs wrapped in more carbs. Doctor's nightmare. My happy place.
The coal-fired time capsule
Upton Fish and Chip Shop near Gainsborough is only open SIX HOURS A WEEK. Fridays and Saturdays. That's it.
They've been cooking on the same coal-fired range since 1948. Same. Coal. Range. For 75 years! The place is tiny, the queue is always out the door, and it's absolutely worth planning your entire weekend around.
The Grimsby haddock (£9.50) tastes like it jumped out of the sea and volunteered to be your dinner. Perfection.
Tynemouth's coastal wonder (that won't make you feel like a whale)
Longsands in Tynemouth does something most chippies don't - they let you order smaller portions. After visiting my 8th chippy in a row back in 2018, I wanted to kiss the owner for this option.
Their Chip Stottie (£5) is this regional Geordie thing - basically a bread bun stuffed with chips. It's carb heaven and should probably be illegal.
I took mine down to the seafront. Seagull tried to mug me. Poor bastard didn't realize who he was dealing with.
Wales' plastic-free champion that stole my heart
Shipdeck in Caerphilly snagged UK fish and chip takeaway of the year for 2024, and I was one of the judges so I'm slightly biased. But seriously, this place deserves every accolade.
The whole family gets involved - even the kids help out. There's this palpable love that goes into every order. You can taste it.
Their homemade cod and parsley fishcakes (£2.80) make me emotional. I'm not even joking. I've tried to reverse-engineer them at home and failed miserably.
Torquay's harbourside haven for the indecisive
Saltwater in Torquay gives you the choice between battered or breadcrumbed fish. Revolutionary.
Their sausages come from an award-winning local butcher. I'm Italian - we take our meat seriously - and even I was impressed. That's saying something.
Ate here with my daughter last summer. She ordered calamari, I went for sausage and chips. We ended up swapping halfway through. Her response: "already updating my resume to become a food critic."
Manchester's neighborhood treasure
The Village Chippy in Manchester is that perfect local spot everyone wishes they had. Nothing fancy, just consistently excellent fish and chips at prices that won't make you wince.
Their cod fish finger sarnie with tartare sauce (£5.95) is like the sophisticated older brother of those frozen fish fingers you ate as a kid.
I went there after a particularly brutal day of filming in 2022. Was grumpy as hell. Left smiling like an idiot. That's the power of proper comfort food.
St Andrews' Scottish specialty showcase
Cromar's in St Andrews opened in 2013 but feels like it's been there forever. They're serious about supporting local fishing - you can taste the difference.
They do battered haggis. And deep-fried Mars bars. I tried both. For research purposes only, obviously.
Their scampi (£9.90) is the freshest I've had outside of Italy. And I spent 4K on a fancy dinner in Milan last year, so that's saying something.
My local obsession in Reigate
Seasalt in Reigate is my neighborhood spot. Had to include it because, well, I'm there embarrassingly often.
Everything's fried to order, which means you'll wait. But like a good lover, some things are worth waiting for. (My wife's gonna kill me for that line.)
The cod bites (£9) are my go-to, but my daughter swears by the calamari (£12.95). She's 12 and has a more sophisticated palate than most food critics I know.
Brighton's four-generation legacy that keeps evolving
Bardsleys in Brighton has been in the same family since 1926. FOUR generations of fish fryers. Can you imagine the Christmas dinner conversations?
They do something unusual - offering grilled and poached options alongside traditional battered. After my doctor gave me The Talk about cholesterol in 2019, this became very relevant to my interests.
Their seafood specials change daily. The skate and chips (£15.99) is worth every penny.
Sometimes I think I should have been born British instead of Italian. Don't tell my mother I said that.
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Investing in the stock market involves several risks, including market volatility, economic downturns, and company-specific factors that can lead to losses. Investors may also face liquidity risk, where they cannot sell an investment quickly without incurring a loss. Diversification and thorough research can help mitigate these risks.
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Statistics
- The average cost of raising a child in the U.S. is estimated to be around $233,610, according to the U.S. Department of Agriculture.
- The average return on investment for the S&P 500 over the past 90 years is about 10% per annum.
- As of 2021, the average student loan debt for recent graduates was approximately $30,000, according to the Federal Reserve.
- In 2020, the average retirement savings for Americans aged 60 to 69 was approximately $195,000, according to Fidelity.
- Research by the National Bureau of Economic Research found that individuals who receive financial education are 25% more likely to save than those who do not.
- According to the Federal Reserve, approximately 39% of Americans do not have enough savings to cover a $400 emergency expense.
- As of 2021, the average American household had approximately $8,400 in credit card debt, according to Experian.
- According to a Gallup poll, 56% of Americans report that their financial situation is better than it was a year ago.
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How To Start Investing for Beginners
Starting to invest can be daunting, but it is a crucial step towards building wealth. Begin by setting clear financial goals, such as saving for retirement or a major purchase. Educate yourself on different investment options, including stocks, bonds, mutual funds, and ETFs. Consider starting with a brokerage account that offers user-friendly platforms and educational resources. Diversify your investments to reduce risk, and consider low-cost index funds or robo-advisors if you prefer a hands-off approach. Make regular contributions, and resist the temptation to react to market fluctuations. Over time, compound interest will help your investments grow significantly.
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