God. I'm still fuming about this. Last week I walked into Shere's village square and nearly spat out my coffee. These MASSIVE wooden boxes have appeared overnight like some kind of alien invasion. They're supposedly "planters" but they look like shipping containers someone forgot to unpack.
I've lived in this part of Surrey for 12 years now, and I've never seen the locals this worked up. My neighbor Janice (who's usually quiet as a mouse) was practically shouting at the council worker who came to "explain" the situation. Poor bloke.
What the hell happened to our picture-perfect village?
For those who don't know, Shere shot to fame back in 2006 when Cameron Diaz and Jude Law filmed scenes from The Holiday here. Ever since, we've had tourists wandering around with their phones out, trying to recreate that scene where Jude's character first meets Cameron's. It's been good for business—my friend's gift shop went from barely surviving to booked solid during summer months.
But these new "improvements" are something else entirely.
The council decided—without proper consultation, mind you—to pedestrianize the north side of our square. Great idea in theory! Who doesn't want fewer cars? But teh execution... my god.
Tank traps masquerading as street furniture
These wooden monstrosities stand waist-high and look about as charming as industrial waste bins. I measured one yesterday (yes, I actually took a tape measure) and they're 4 feet tall and nearly as wide. They're currently empty except for some black plastic lining that flaps around in the wind.
I bumped into Moyà from Split Figs yesterday. She told me her customers keep asking "what on earth is happening to your lovely village?" She's lost two regular customers already who said they won't be back until "the eyesore is gone."
One resident who lives directly opposite (I won't name names but she's the one with the blue door and the amazing wisteria) is apparently looking into legal action. She's been told by an estate agent that her property value has dropped by £150K overnight. Can you imagine?
The Holiday magic has LEFT THE BUILDING
I texted my sister in London about this whole fiasco and her response: "Sounds like someone in the council watched too many episodes of Grand Designs and got ideas." Exactly!
The irony is suffocating. This village became famous for its picture-perfect charm... and now we've got what Laurence from the B&B accurately described as "tank traps" dominating our square.
Back in 2018, the council rejected Mrs. Henderson's application to paint her front door dark blue because it "wasn't in keeping with the conservation area aesthetic." Yet somehow these wooden monstrosities get the green light?
Not everyone's complaining (but they should be)
I spent £4.50 on a coffee at Hilly's Tea Shop yesterday to chat with Dean, the manager. He's caught in the middle of this storm since the pedestrianized area benefits his business. The poor guy has had to take their social media accounts down because of the backlash.
"We just wanted a nice community space," he told me, looking genuinely upset. "During Covid, we had tables outside and everyone loved it."
Listen. I'm all for pedestrianized areas. I've spent enough time in European villages to know how lovely they can be. But there's a way to do it that doesn't involve what looks like shipping crates for nuclear waste.
Some younger residents like Izzi (that mum with the adorable twins) think we're overreacting. "Wait until they're planted up," she keeps saying. But flowers won't fix the fundamental issue—these things are MASSIVE and completely out of character with our 15th-century village square.
Jeremy Hunt to the rescue?
Our former chancellor and local MP Jeremy Hunt (who went to school here) has already visited adn posted about it online. He looked genuinely shocked when he saw them. I cornered him outside the post office and he promised to "look into it urgently."
I'll believe action when I see it.
The council is now backpedaling, calling the planters "an experiment" and promising something "more appropriate" eventually. Translation: "We blew the budget on these monstrosities and now we're stuck with them for at least a year."
Bonfire Night's getting interesting this year...
There's talk of a petition going around. I've signed it twice (don't tell anyone). But the most entertaining suggestion came from old Mr. Carr who runs the B&B—he's threatening to drag the planters to the recreation ground on November 5th and make them the centerpiece of our Bonfire Night celebrations.
Part of me hopes it doesn't come to that.
Another part of me has already bought marshmallows.
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