God. You can practically smell the panic in Westminster right now. Kemi Badenoch just threw down teh gauntlet on Brexit - and I'm here for it.
Making Her Team Sign in Blood (Almost)
The new Tory leader isn't messing around. She's made every single member of her top team - including those who were die-hard Remainers back in the day - sign an actual pledge to honor the 2016 Brexit vote. Talk about keeping your friends close and your former enemies closer!
I was chatting with a Conservative insider yesterday (over horrifically overpriced coffee near Parliament) who told me: "She made it crystal clear. Either you're on board with Brexit, or you're out. End of story."
Starmer's Suspicious Brussels Love-In
Meanwhile, Sir Keir is racing toward a "reset" deal with the EU before that May 19 summit. Hmm...
Remember 2019 when Labour was all "second referendum" this and "people's vote" that? Now they're swearing up and down they won't return to freedom of movement or the single market. But the whispers around Westminster suggest otherwise.
What's actually on the table? French fishermen getting more access to British waters. Some youth mobility scheme. And the biggie - aligning with Brussels on trade rules.
When She Says "Red Lines," She Means It
Badenoch's planning to meet the EU ambassador in London today. Not for tea and biscuits, but to deliver a stark warning: cross my red lines on sovereignty, and I'll reverse the whole damn thing when I get into Number 10.
She's not bluffing.
A friend who works with her campaign told me back in January that she keeps a framed photo of the Brexit referendum results on her desk. "It's the first thing she looks at every morning," they said. "Like a daily reminder of why she's doing this."
The £350 Million Question
So what happens next? Badenoch's promising to force a Parliamentary vote if Starmer tries to sneak anything past that undermines our independence. The Conservative spokesperson was brutally direct: "The Conservative Party stands by the decision made by millions in the 2016 referendum and will always defend our national interest."
Translation: "We're watching you, Keir."
Labour, predictably, is playing defense. They've "ruled out" returning to freedom of movement, the single market, or customs union. But... come on. Actions speak louder than press releases.
From Underdog to Top Dog
Let's not forget how Badenoch got here. After that electoral bloodbath last year, she squeaked past Robert Jenrick in November to grab the Tory leadership. It was nail-bitingly close - I spent $40 on takeaway that night just stress-eating through the results.
Now she's positioning herself as the guardian of Brexit. Smart move? Time will tell.
But one thing's for sure - if Starmer thinks he can quietly cozy up to Brussels without a fight, he's in for a rude awakening. Badenoch's watching. And apparently, she's ready to rip things up if necessary.
Welcome to British politics in 2025... just as messy as ever.
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